That’s right, you heard me correctly. Let me explain:
Yesterday afternoon I was at a local elementary school working as the first-grade counselor at a YMCA After-School program. I’ve complained often enough on this blog about the difficult children and how frustrating it can be, but now it’s gone to a new low. Those kids turned on me. Well, actually it was one kid, but I’m sure that the others paid him to do it. The kid (which for confidentiality’s sake we’ll call Sam), assaulted me! Yes, that’s right. I have been incapicitated by a seven-year old.
We were playing a game called “Hand Soccer” which basically is a cross between soccer and Ultimate Frisbee. The game was counselors vs. kids, and I was passed the ball in front of the goal and was in prime position to score. As I jumped (with exceptional athletic prowess) to receive the pass, Sam ran directly into me and knocked me off-balance. Trying not to land on the poor boy, I shifted my body weight to land on a different leg and came down directly on the outside of my right ankle. I didn’t roll it. I Super Smash-Brothers-style pounded it. Needless to say, I didn’t exactly leap up in response. Reality was more like me on my back groaning while biting my tongue to contain the rage within me that sought to leap forth and possess this child’s soul. Why would I get so mad, do you ask? Little Sam, instead of asking me if I was alright, leaned directly over my face and began taunting me! He laughed and laughed and chanted things which my rage blocked my ears from deciphering. I wanted to kill the boy. It is a testimony to the power of God that my hands didn’t burst forth from the ground where they lay and clamp down on his devilish little windpipe.
To summarize, I am now on crutches with a badly sprained ankle. I’m missing work, which means I don’t get paid. And I didn’t get to strangle the boy. The only consolation is that later I was informed that as little Sam continued to play the game, he and a kindergartener smashed heads directly. Ahh….God is just!
Yup. I was there. I threw the pass. And the little kid not only taunted, he laughed and pointed his little ‘finger of death’ at Drew as he lay on the floor, somehow keeping his cool. 5 minutes later, the kid is screaming like a newborn (literally – it was ear-piercing).
actually I threw the pass that led to the pass being thrown.
i actually sent him as revenge for your torturous chase on prom night. revenge is mine!!!
still coming this week with your busted leg?!?!?
Good to hear from you, Lauren. I remember prom night; what a frightening picture! We’ll be there (without crutches!). See you then.
thursday night is good. email me if you don’t have my cell. call early, and some salsa may be waiting